Gorton? Gah-ton? Mais non! Cretons!

Ho-ly cow! Could they have butchered this any more than they did? It’s painful. Cretons is French-Canadian peasant food and, being a descendant of French-Canadian peasants, I have some experience with this. “Gorton” is for those non-Franco Granite Staters who can’t wrap their tongues around French words.

Pas Gah-ton! C'est cretons!

And a “Granite State” gem? Excuse me? Mailhot (pronounced much like “my yacht,” only without the one-percenter pretense) is from Lewiston, Maine. Cretons was an occasional breakfast treat when I was kid. It’s good on toast, but you have to take it out of the refrigerator and let it soften up a bit before you can spread it.

Yes, yes, I know there are plenty of French-Canadians in New Hampshire, some of my ancestors among them, and I know it’s got to be a workout coming up with interesting bits of local color on the non-stop campaign trail, but can we try a little harder, please?

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